Letting People Know

Now you know you've got cancer, so how do you go about telling other people? In certain circumstances this can be as stressful as finding out for yourself. Just like you, everyone that you tell is going to want to know all the details and it is up to you to decide just how much you want to share, when you want to share it, and with whom.

My wife was obviously the first person I had to break the news to. It just so happened she was in the room when I got the initial call from my primary care informing me the biopsy had discovered cancer cells. She could read the signs on my face that the news I was receiving was pretty serious. There was zero time to prepare for this conversation and honestly maybe it was for the best. After getting off the phone with my doctor I then had to tell my wife the news, the worst part is we had no other details apart from knowing that I have cancer. As I mentioned in my summary of testing, the unknown is the worst part. After getting the initial news out of the way and allowing the initial shock to subside, we quickly resolved to take this one day at a time and not get ahead of ourselves with assuming things we don't know.

So Who's Next?

The next people I decided to tell was a select group of my work colleagues. I initially limited this group to a couple of my closest work friends who I work hand in hand with. The other group I chose to tell were my immediate supervises.

I thought it was important to share what was happening with these people sooner than later. Honestly, anyone who was paying attention would have noticed that the guy who had previously had one or two dental / medical appointments per year is attending multiple medical appointments per week out of the blue. For this reason alone I felt I owed it to my supervisors an explanation, as well as to address my plans going forward. I was very upfront with my diagnosis and with all the facts I knew at the moment, which to be perfectly honest were pretty limited. I also felt it very important for me to let them know that I had no intentions of changing my routine and planned continue to work as normal.

Everyone on I talked to was on board and incredibly supportive. I can't tell you how much reassurance and comfort in just hearing that you have team that has your back.

Telling The Family

So that last group I brought into the know was my family. I have to say this was a very difficult decision, but was done for a very specific reason. I didn't want to inform my family prior to having as much information as possible. What I feared the most was to bring my family into this same scenario I was experiencing where every other day was some new piece of information and things were constantly evolving. Additionally I personally didn't want the added stress of having to report updates constantly that I felt I would have owed my family.

Once I finally finished with the last of my testing, I met with my oncologist and he laid out our treatment plan. Once I was armed with this, I felt like the time was right to tell my family. This way I could let them know what was going on and come armed to the conversation with as much information possible.

Everyone Else

After I was sure my immediate circle was informed, I found myself thinking about how I wanted to address the topic with others. I assumed others around me may be observant enough to notice some change in my lifestyle or patterns. I decided I didn't mind talking about with those who were inquisitive. Additionally, I decided to write this blog to document my journey.

The purpose of this blog is two fold, first and foremost it is for me to document the process and potentially have some record of it years from now. Second, I would like it to serve as a source of information for others. So who are the "others" that I'm referring to? I guess this group could be pretty broad, first I hope that someone else diagnosed with cancer might come across this blog and find at least one piece of information useful or helpful in some way. I also consider it a way for those who are interested in what I'm going through, but may not want to bother me with questions to get some information and feel like they aren't bothering me with questions.

So all of that said, I invite you all to follow along! I would encourage anyone following to sign-up for an account and comment. Additionally, if you are signed up you'll get an email when a new post is made!